Haven't been feeling really good. It's a long week break as there were 3 days of public holidays for the week as Hari Raya clashes with Merdeka Day. When I used to work in corporate companies, I used to look forward to all these public holidays as I just want a break and I will be happily baking all types of food. I remembered I used to bake at least once a week and i will be cooking quite often as well. Baking those days just makes me feel happy. But ever since I took a long break and working for my family, I just don't look forward to holidays as I don't know what to do and I feel pretty lost. I no longer cook and bake as much as I used to and my house no longer stock up with tons of baking and cooking ingredients and I only bake once in a while when I'm really down. I guess where I am now no longer feels like home which is why I no longer enjoy doing the things I used to do. And I don't feel like I'm doing enough for my own life. Im still having a tough time figuring out what I want to do. It's sad when I still have quite a while more before I move somewhere else where my new home is going to be. Hopefully when I'm there I will eventually find what I really want to do.
I do feel a lot of times life isn't complicated at all. It's myself who complicate matters. I always wanted a simple life so that I can be happy easily. But I guess the environment I was brought up didn't allow me to do so. And so many mistakes had been made in my life which made me grew stronger and able to see what and how life really is. I don't blame whatever things that had happened and I believe for every steps that I made, God has its reasons for letting me to go through it.
Anyway, enough of babbling. I should be off to gym now. Well, I shall continue my holiday post next.